Chapter 20b

Maxwell’s Legacy (2):

 

I left Heero’s house feeling pretty good…and a bit guilty for my response to his question about my plans after high school. But hell, I couldn’t lie about my decision, could I? I mean it’s something I’ve always wanted to do even before having Heero in my life. I guess it’s in my blood (Mom’s insatiable need to travel must be a factor and I won’t even go into my real father’s tendencies…since I don’t know it) or maybe it’s just because I’ve been shipped from orphanage to foster home one too many times. Either way, I’m not the kind of guy who likes to stay in one place for too long. It’s even a miracle I’ve lasted this long in this city. Of course it’s because of Heero and my mom or else I would have moved to the next best place.

 

But when Heero made out with me the second time, I kinda felt the sadness he was experiencing at my decision. It was in the way he touched me, you know? It’s just…something I can’t even put into words and I don’t want to sound cheesy but it was intense in every sense of the word. I didn’t even know I was crying until he began to wipe my cheeks gently. Looks like I’m becoming way too much of a softy these days. I don’t want to leave Heero, don’t get me wrong. I want to be with the guy for as long as I can or until the day he decides he’s had enough of me. So why the hell didn’t I ask him to follow me when high school’s over? Why was I so scared to bring up the suggestion of him taking some time off from college to travel the world with me? Is it because I think he might say no? I don’t want to hear the rejection and that’s pretty cowardly of me now that I think of it. But hey, it’s no big deal really, the opportunity will come again and I’ll have the nerve to put my proposal to him. I can only cross my fingers and hope he says yes.

 

My mom’s already home by the time I pull up to the driveway. I can see the lights in the living room as well as the faint smell of toast wafting through the windows. I eye my watch and wince, knowing I’m coming home later than she expects me to. But remembering how ‘absent’ she had sounded on the phone when I called to ask for her permission, I can’t help wondering how she’s feeling mentally as well as physically. I mean I’m glad she decided to go out to get her hair done and stuff, but I think she’s still trying to recover from the shock of everything that happened the other day.

 

Yeah, yeah, there goes my guilty conscience again.

 

But damn it, the bastard had it coming. How was I to know that mom would take it this badly?

 

“I’m home,” I greet as loudly as I can. The smell of toast and burnt ones at that - is much stronger and as I walk into the living room I can see her fast asleep on the couch and amongst those gigantic Indian pillows. She’s dressed in a black silk housecoat which gives me a clear view of the swell of her breasts and a long bare leg. Blushing faintly at how wanton she looks, I lean over to cover the exposed flesh, before reaching for the remote control to the TV to lower its volume. It’s the local news on and I doubt mom watched anything. There’s a bottle of red wine – almost empty from the look of things – and a plate with charred pieces of toast on it.

 

Sighing softly, I pick up the champagne glass and plate and take the time to look at her properly. Her hair’s wrapped in a black hair piece thing that makes her look like a Turkish merchant and without her makeup, I swear she looks like she could still be in her mid-twenties. But on closer inspection, I can see the lines of strain around her eyes and mouth. Is it age? The stress of work – I guess working as a government attaché for the military division isn’t all that great. Or is it simply the added baggage from my prank of the other night? Either way, I think I feel a bit sorry for her and wish I could make it up to her in some way but then again…

“You’re hiding something else from me, aren’t you, mom?” I whisper softly before making my way to the kitchen to clean up. She’s usually a neat freak but seeing the dishes and loaf of bread still sitting out on the counter, worries me greatly. Man, she’s really losing it.

 

As I begin to wash the dishes, I think I hear her stirring in the living room. “Duo? Baby? Is that you?” Her voice sounds slurred. No surprise since she’s been chugging that damn wine for god knows how long.

 

“Yeah, mom, I’m home,” I reply, turning my head a little to see her standing (at least trying to stand) beside the kitchen door. The housecoat is slipping off her left shoulder and she’s not making any attempt to pull it back up. Her eyes look dull and unfocused. She tries to take a step and staggers weakly.

 

“Mom, you need to go lie down,” I say, surprised to find my voice a bit curt and rather cold. But a part of me is really getting impatient with her. And the way she looks – like some cheap slut – is grating on my nerves. “You don’t look so good.”

 

“Thanks, baby,” she replies with a low groan. “I feel like someone’s drilling a hole in my head. You wouldn’t happen to know where my bottle of aspirin is, would you?”

 

“In your bathroom cabinet?” I reply with much sarcasm in my voice. I immediately feel like a heel for acting this way, after all a part of me is still guilty for her current state.

 

“You’re not much help,” she says with a pout but all the same she staggers – almost stumbling at some point – towards her bedroom. I reach for the vacuum cleaner to work on the floor when suddenly, the doorbell rings. I jump in surprise because one, we don’t really get a lot of visitors and two, it’s sorta late in the evening to have anyone come over for a little chit chat. But assuming it’s probably a neighbor coming over to borrow something; I turn off the machine and make my way to the front door. Pearl, who was curled up in her basket, yawns, stretches and begins to rub her head against my ankle in greeting.

 

“And hello to you too, precious,” I mutter while scratching behind her ears absently. I take a peek out the window and immediately feel my heart pound harder within my chest. There are two men out there and my first instinct is that Teruo has sent his henchmen to finish us off. However, taking a good look, they don’t really seem like guys who would work for Teruo. For one thing, they aren’t dressed in black and don’t have those dark sunglasses on. Instead, these guys look like they must have stepped out from the pages of a Sherlock Holmes novel. They are both dressed in expensive but well-fitting brown suits. One looks to be in his mid-fifties or early sixties, with a shock of white hair and a matching beard and mustache. The other might be his son, since they both have the same eye color – hazel – and his obvious youth. He’s sorta handsome, if you like skinny looking guys who look British.

 

Noticing that the younger guy’s about the press the bell again, I open it quickly and force a friendly smile on my face.

 

“Good evening, gentlemen. How may I help you?”

 

I’m not sure if there’s anything extraordinary on my face, but I swear the older guy actually jumps and gasps in shock at the sight of me. His eyes widen and I’m worried he’s going to fall down and pass out soon.

 

“My God…” he mutters. “Daniel…”

 

Daniel??

 

“Please forgive my father,” the younger man says with an apologetic smile as he holds out a hand to steady the older man. “He’s quite surprised to find that you actually exist.”

 

“Huh?” Even their accent sounds funny. No, they aren’t foreigners but they definitely don’t sound like they’re from around here. In fact, they sound cultured, if you know what I mean.

 

The man laughs softly and then steps up to me for a handshake. “I’m sorry I haven’t introduced myself properly. My name is Harold Winters and this is my father Professor Archibald Winters, retired of course. I believe you received our letters telling of our visit?”

 

Whoa…slow down now. Harold Winters? Archibald Winters? Letters? Visit? What the fuck’s going on here?!

 

Harold looks at me with slight confusion on his visage. “This is the Maxwell residence, isn’t it? Or father perhaps we got the wrong…” He’s reaching into his jacket to pull out a piece of paper when I hear myself saying clearly,

 

“You’ve got the right place. This is the Maxwell residence.”

 

“Ah, good,” Harold replies with a sigh of relief. “We’ve come a long way and we weren’t sure…ah…Eleanor I believe?”

 

I turn around at my mother’s name and see her standing behind me. She looks as white as a ghost with a hand creeping towards her throat as if planning to choke herself. At that moment, I swear I’ve never been more scared of the look in my mom’s eyes. It’s like watching a train wreck about to happen and knowing there’s nothing you can do about it. Her eyes are beginning to glaze over and I can see the clear panic, hate and fear within them.

 

“Get out,” she says in a voice that sends chills down my spine. “Get out of here before I call the police. Get out of here!”

 

“Mom!” I cry out in dismay. “What the hell…?!”

 

“You never told him about it, did you, Eleanor?” Archibald speaks up in a voice that’s quite commanding and strong. Definitely not the voice you’d hear from a guy as old as that. It almost makes me think he was in the military or something. But what the hell’s happening here? Why does my mom look so scared? And what did Archibald mean by her not telling me about ‘it’?!

 

“GET OUT!!” My mother shrieks and my blood runs cold at the pure murder in her eyes. In horror I watch her run towards the front door and try to shut it against them, her housecoat falling opening to reveal the sheer lace bra and panties she’s wearing.

 

Jesus Christ!

 

“GET OUT! GET OUT! LEAVE US ALONE!! JUST LEAVE US THE HELL ALONE!!”

 

“The boy has a right to know about his father, Eleanor!” Archibald bellows and with a nod to his son, Harold pushes the door open a bit wider sending my mom toppling into the coat stand beside it. But like the damn Energizer bunny, she leaps back to her feet and tries to pounce on Harold while Archibald walks into the house and towards me. There’s a look of compassion and slight awe within his eyes at the same time but I’m now scared – scared and confused and worried about my mom and who these guys are and what they want and my father…

 

“Oh god…!” I sink my hands into my hair, feeling as if my mind’s going to shut down in a second if someone doesn’t explain things to me soon! “What the hell’s going on here?!”

 

“There’s no doubt about it,” Archibald says with a small smile. “You are Daniel’s heir in every sense of the word. It’s just plan uncanny how much you look like him especially when you smiled out there. It was like looking at him when he was your age all over again.” His voice cracks and to my surprise there are tears in his eyes.

 

“Please forgive an old man for becoming too sentimental,” he says, wiping his eyes with a white handkerchief. “But oh how much Daniel would have loved to see you just once before he…before he…”

 

“Don’t listen to him, Duo!” my mother shrieks. Harold’s got her trapped within his arms even though she keeps trying to release herself in a fruitless effort. “They’re lying! They’re all lying!! They just want to take you away from me and I won’t let them!”

 

“For the love of God, Eleanor!” Archibald thunders, the tears now forgotten as his brows furrow in anger. “How long have you kept this from him?! All the letters Daniel’s sent over the past few months? What did you do with them?!”

 

“I won’t let him take Duo away from me!” she continues to scream, while looking at me with that maniacal look in her eyes. “Don’t listen to them, baby! I’ve been very good to you, you know that!”

 

“But you knew, didn’t you?” Harold finally says and this time his once pleasant voice is tight with irritation. “You knew Daniel passed away a week ago. We sent you several letters and even called you, you blasted wretch!”

 

No…oh no…it can’t…it can’t be…

 

“Stop it! Stop it! Can’t  you see you’re frightening my son?! Duo?! Duo, baby! Answer me!!”

 

Archibald turns to look at me again. “We’re sorry you had to hear the news like this, son. But it is the truth. Your biological father passed away a week ago in his sleep. He suffered with lung cancer and eventually lost the battle even though he put up a valiant fight.”

 

No…I had plans…my trip around the world had included seeing my father sometime…no…I can’t believe it…

 

“I know this is a shock for you, son even though you’ve never met him before. But Daniel’s dying wish was to see you in the flesh and although we sent several letters to your mother asking for her permission, I assume you never received them.”

 

The furtive look in her eyes. The way she always dashed to the phone to pick it up before I could make a move. There were never any messages on the answering machine. She’d always delete them before I could listen. The mails. I don’t think she’s ever let me go to the mailbox to pick them up.

 

“Duo? Duo baby?” She sounds like she’s trying to appease me. The bitch. The cold-hearted bitch! “Duo baby…where are you going? Don’t…don’t look at me like that, please! I only did it for you! You’ve got to believe me!”

 

“We would like you to come with us, Duo,” Archibald says with a small smile, completely ignoring my mother’s insane ramblings. “You are requested to be there for the funeral and the reading of his Will. You do not have to give us an answer now…”

 

“Don’t listen to him, Duo!! They want to take you away from me!!”

 

“…but it is imperative we get a response as soon as possible. Here is the address to the hotel we are staying at the moment.” He gives me a small white card. “My cell phone number is written on the back as well as the number to our hotel room. Again, I’m sure this is a shock to you and you’ll need some time to think about what you plan to do. But remember that his funeral is this Saturday and the sooner you give us a response, the better.”

 

“DUO!!” My mother screams desperately. “DON’T LEAVE ME!!”

 

But I’ve heard enough. I snatch the card out of Archibald’s hand and all but run into my bedroom, making sure I lock the door behind me as if afraid any of the three adults will come in. I can still hear them shouting in the living room as I slide to the floor weakly, feeling my eyes burn with unshed tears.

 

It can’t be. I still can’t believe my mother would do something like that to me…to us. It’s too cruel. Just too cruel.

 

“Oh god…Heero…” He’s the only sane person in the world to me right now. The only one I can talk to and hope to make sense of what’s happening to me. I rise to my hands and knees and crawl towards my bed, hoping and praying he’d still be awake.

 

 

__

 

 

I fall back to the bed and stare blankly at the ceiling, allowing my cell phone to slip from my fingers and to the floor. The voices in the living room are no longer there and I have the feeling that they must have left while I was talking to Heero. Funny how my mind seems to zone in on that guy whenever I’m with him. Everything else seems irrelevant and pointless at that point.

 

But now, I’m back to reality and I swear, reality is so damn cold.

 

The lights in my room haven’t been turned on yet, so the dark is a welcome comfort to me at this time. Heero had asked me what I planned to do next but I told him I wasn’t sure yet. I still needed sometime to think but now I already have an idea of what I’m going to do. It’s simple really and something I have always known I’d end up doing anyway.

 

I’ve got to leave Eleanor.

 

I have to give an answer to Archibald later on today (it’s Thursday already by the way) and if I get my stuff ready, I can leave for my dad’s place on Friday and spend the weekend with his family. I think I’ll ask Heero and see if he wants to come with me. God knows I can’t do it alone.

 

I sit up quickly and turn on the bedside lamp. My eyes roam around the small room quickly, trying to access just how much I’d have to take with me. Maybe Heero will even let me room with him which would make things so much easier between us. I wouldn’t have to worry about not being able to see him as much as I would like. I’d even be able to get a job (Eleanor wouldn’t let me work) and fend for myself. I’ve always been a survivor anyway. Being with her was just the icing on the cake.

 

“Might as well get going,” I mutter as I make my way towards the closet to pull out my small suitcase. All the stickers and tags I’d gotten from the trip around Europe is still stuck on it and for a moment, my throat tightens as I remember how happy I had been at the time. Back then, Eleanor could do no wrong – well besides not letting me speak to Heero – but I remember how fun-loving she was, how her smile could light up a room and all the approving looks she had gotten from other men. But her eyes had been for me and only for me. She would speak of how much she loved and cherished me. But as I look back at all her actions and even now, I can’t help but wonder if she’s reliving her moments with dad through me. I’m ashamed to admit this but there have been times when my mom’s acted in ways that might not be considered appropriate. No, she’s not forced me to sleep with her or anything that disgusting, but I swear there’ve been times when she gets this look in her eyes that makes me uncomfortable, if you know what I mean.

 

She sees dad when she looks at me, that’s what. I’m the young Daniel she met and fell in love with and she’s loving him through me. How fucked up is that?

 

“Duo? Baby?”

 

I stiffen at the sound of her voice, my fingers clenching around the dress shirt I had plucked from the hanger. Her voice sounds small and tired behind the door but I make no move towards it as she knocks gently again.

 

“I know you’re still awake, baby,” she says, sniffling softly. “And I know you’re going to leave me now, but…I…I just want you to know that I did it all for a reason. Your father…he…he…” She begins to sob harder and I have to close my eyes at the heart-wrenching sound.

 

I can’t forgive her. I just can’t! she’s going to make this so damn hard for me.

 

I take a deep breath and force myself to continue packing, willing myself to remember all the lies and deceit over the past few months. With that firmly in mind, I work faster, now tossing in anything my hands can find into the suitcase.

 

“Duo…” she says weakly, knocking lightly on the door again. “Will you at least hear my side of the story before you walk away?”

 

“What? And listen to more lies, huh?” I had no intention of talking but my mouth tends to run away from me sometimes. Damn it.

 

“I’m not lying this time, baby. I’m really not…”

 

“DON’T CALL ME THAT!” I bellow as I storm to the door and slam a fist against it. I hear her give an audible gasp of shock and then there’s the dull sound of her falling to the floor. I’m not sure if she’s passed out and I would have opened the door to see but she tries to speak again, her voice much closer as if pressed against it.

 

“Don’t call me that,” I say in a much quieter tone. “I’m not your baby. I’m not Daniel, Eleanor. Can’t you see that? You can’t…”

 

Damn it! Why are the words stuck in my throat? Why does it feel as if I’m going to break down into tears all over again?

 

“Duo…Duo…okay, I won’t call you ba…that anymore, okay? Now will you please listen to me?”

 

“Talk…I’m listening…”

 

“Won’t you at least open the door?”

 

“Eleanor…”

 

“Okay, okay…I understand.” She takes a deep breath and sniffles again. “I told you that I was pregnant with you at sixteen, didn’t I? And…and how your father left me when he heard the news…well…that wasn’t exactly how it went.”

 

I groan and slide to the floor, raising my knees to my chest and burying my face against it in disbelief and misery.

 

“But…but listen to me, ba…Duo,” she adds quickly as if realizing that she’s fighting a losing battle here. “I was scared okay. I was only sixteen and I didn’t know what to do. Your father was in the Airborne Division and he had to fly away a lot. We…we met at a party thrown for them for after a successful mission and one thing led to another and the next thing you know…”

 

“I was created. Yay.”

 

“Oh, don’t make it sound like you weren’t wanted, Duo,” she says desperately. “Your father…he…he…he said he loved me and wanted to be with me and asked if I’d wait for him to return after the next mission and I was so happy he wanted to be with me. There I was, some girl with no parents or money, working as a secretary for only two dollars an hour and then this handsome soldier, whom everyone loved to pieces had eyes for me! Little ol’ Eleanor Rose.”

 

She sniffled again and forced herself to continue. “Of course I didn’t know I was pregnant when Daniel was sent away but after missing my period, I knew something was definitely wrong. I went to the clinic and the doctor told me the good news. I was pregnant and it was supposed to be the happiest day of my life but…but…”

 

“Oh, Duo, you’ve got to understand where I was coming from! If anyone had known that I was pregnant, they would have kicked me out of the base. I couldn’t raise you on my own and I wasn’t even sure if Daniel was going to return safely or not. And a part me was also sure that he wouldn’t want to see you. I’ve seen some soldiers deny their offspring and I didn’t want to go through that with Daniel. I didn’t want him to hate me and to think I was so careless and burden him with you. So…so I decided not to tell him or anyone else about it. I ran away, Duo. I had to! My thinking then was that I would give birth to you away from the base…and I could leave you at the local church where you’d have a much better life than I could ever give you. It was selfish of me, I know that now and believe me, every waking moment was spent thinking about you. I would come by the orphanage to visit but I wouldn’t let you see me. I felt too ashamed to show myself to you. I felt that you wouldn’t want a mother who was as…pathetic as I was, so I made up my mind to work as hard as I could to get to the top and to show that I could be a mother you’d be proud of.”

 

“Duo…? Are you still listening to me?”

“Keep talking,” I reply in a flat voice.

 

“O…okay…well, I did go back to the base but things weren’t the same. Someone had replaced me…Daniel had returned but according to the news, he had found himself another girl. I couldn’t believe it. I guess that now I look back, it was really all my fault. I hadn’t told anyone where I was going to, so there was no way for Daniel to look for me. But then, I was so angry and hurt that he would forget me so easily and I vowed I’d make him pay for what he did to me. He had promised to marry me but he didn’t. However, it didn’t stop me from walking up to that courthouse and demanding they change my last name to Maxwell. And with that paper in my hands, I went back to the orphanage and told the Sister in charge to change your name as well. You would answer to Maxwell as a reminder of just whose son you belonged to.”

 

“Although he never knew I existed,” I spit out coldly.

 

She gasps again but all she can mutter is a soft ‘Oh, Duo’ that has me gritting my teeth. “So what now, Eleanor? After a story like that, what do you want me to do, huh?”

 

“To give me another chance?” she asks weakly but that makes me burst out into laughter and believe me it’s not because someone cracked a joke around here.

 

“Why wouldn’t you let me see him, huh? Why did you burn all those letters? What are you so damn afraid of?!”

 

“Because if he takes you away, he’ll never let me see you again!” she replies vehemently. “Don’t you see, Duo? He’s more powerful than I am and can just…”

 

“A visit, Eleanor. Just one measly visit wouldn’t have hurt.”

 

“But…”

 

“You had no right to keep me away from him even when you knew he was dying for fuck’s sake!”

 

“Then that is my sin, Duo! That is the sin I will take to my grave along with so many others! I was only doing it because…”

 

“Because of your selfish love, Eleanor,” I reply coldly, ignoring the choked sob she gives. “So much so that you won’t even let me be with the one I love! Yes, Eleanor. I’m still with Heero and we are still going to be together whether you like it or not.”

 

I rise to my feet and open the door carefully but it still doesn’t stop her from falling into my room from her crouched position. Her face is red and puffy from all the tears she’s been shedding. Her once coiffed locks look limp and lifeless around her features and the housecoat is barely clinging to her half-naked form. I look into those dark eyes and hope to feel the anger within me again but sadly, all I feel for her now is pity.

 

“Duo,” she whispers softly, her eyes shimmering with even more tears. She lifts her hands to me slowly but I take a step back with a light shake of my head.

 

“I’m leaving with them tomorrow, Eleanor,” I reply calmly, quite pleased to find that I’m able to think clearly now. “I will be going with Heero if he’ll come and maybe when I return I’ll move in with him.”

 

“Oh God, no…please don’t do this to me, Duo,” she begs, trying to hold on to the hem of my pants. “I’m begging you! I know I’ve made some bad choices but I only thought I was…”

 

“…doing it for the best, yes, you’ve said that several times already but that excuse isn’t good enough, Eleanor. I think I’m old enough to make my own decisions anyway and I know what I want now.”

 

“NOOOO!!!” she suddenly shrieks and launches herself at me. It takes me a second to realize that she’s scratched me with those long fingernails of hers and my left cheek is now bleeding freely from the sudden attack. “I WON’T LET YOU LEAVE ME! I LOVE YOU, DUO! DON’T YOU SEE THAT?!”

 

“Not like this you don’t! Get away from me!” I shove her away from and stagger to my feet, breathing harshly as I stare at her huddled form on the floor. I can’t take this anymore! I have to get out of here before I go insane!

 

I run for my half-packed suitcase, tossing in a few more personal items before snapping it shut. I can see her crawling towards me again as I reach for my cell phone and unaware of the small cry of fear that I let loose from my lips, I all but run out of the room as fast as my legs can go. I grab my jacket from the coat hook and let myself out of the house without a second look back but her haunting wails continue to echo in my mind long after my former home is no longer in view. I won’t even bother to use the bike, walking will have to suffice for now.

 

However, it’s a chilly night and the empty and silent streets only do more to remind me of just how alone I’ve always been from the day I was born. And with no chance to hold them back, the tears begin to fall again and this time, I don’t bother wiping them away.

 

 

 

~End Period TwentyB~