Rating: NC-17

Warnings: Angst, yaoi, lemon

Pairings: Ogata/Akira

 

 

The Sinners:

 

It’s always so easy to allow one to let go of his or her inhibitions all in the quest for self-fulfillment.

 

“Take me home with you…”

 

Simple words but yet strong enough to make me lose said inhibitions. How ironic.

 

It is going to be different this time around. I just know it. Whereas, our first time had been one of discovery and stolen moments, this time around it’s going to be something that we both want and I hadn’t even been the one to initiate it!

 

I can barely remember the drive back to my home or how I even manage to weave my way through the traffic to reach my destination. All I can see before me are the sinful images of the boy beside me writhing beneath or above me in pure ecstasy. The sounds of the cars around me dissolve into moans of pleasure – his pleasure. I am going to take my fill of Akira until he can take no more! The situation is just too perfect!

 

I finally park the car being careful not to show just how impatient I am by screeching to a sudden halt. I am already making mental plans on how to entice the boy once we get into my apartment. Would we grope each other on the way upstairs? Would we both be too impatient to even begin? Would we rip each other’s clothes off and go at it in the living room or in the hallway? Would he want me to take him against the wall again?

 

Kami, but my pants are now so tight that I can practically feel my cock attempt to make a dent through the cloth! Cursing softly, I turn to face my lover for the night only to stare in disbelief at what meets my gaze.

 

He’s…he’s…sleeping?!

 

What the hell? What happened to all that talk about him trying to prove himself better than Shindo to me?! Just what in the world had he planned? To fall asleep on me…now? Of all times?! But despite it all, I can’t help but stare at the peaceful picture he presents to me in this state. His lips are moist and every now and then they would part with each escape of a warm breath. Before I can stop myself, I reach out to caress his cheek gently, brushing away some of those long dark strands that try to slip into his mouth. My thumb begins its own exploration – slowly tracing the outline of those full lips, imagining, wondering what it would be like to taste them all over again. I frown as the sudden image of that blond loudmouth fills my mind and I reluctantly find myself comparing him to Akira again.

 

I shake my head quickly. I really must stop thinking about that brat. So he just kissed me once in the elevator and now he’s like a damn thorn on my side. Why was I allowing him to get under my skin so much?

 

Akira mutters something and it jerks me back to reality. I lean closer to catch whatever he’s saying and to my surprise and slight disappointment, I hear the words ‘Shindo’ escape his lips. So, it seems as if he hasn’t gotten over his boyfriend. What a pity.

 

“Akira,” I call out softly, while shaking him a little to rouse him. “Akira. Wake up. We are here.”

But like a stubborn mule, the boy refuses to budge and instead snuggles deeper within my car seat. He even dares to brush away my hand and I all but curse out loud at his antics. It reminds me of the times when his father had asked me to wake the boy up when he was much younger. I must still have the scars from having my arms or chest clawed at from the vivacious boy. Apparently, Akira still doesn’t like anyone disrupting his sleep time. I vaguely wonder how Shindo manages to deal with it.

 

“Akira!” I call out a bit louder with a scowl on my features. “Get up now or I’m taking you back home.”

 

He opens up his lashes slowly and eyes me warily as if wondering why and how he got himself into my car. “Sen…sensei?” he asks groggily.

 

“It’s just a fifteen minute drive and you’re already this deep into sleep?” I ask with a raised brow. “Are you coming in or not?”

 

“I’m sorry, sensei. I was just…”

 

I silence him with a wave of my hand, feeling myself get even more irritable as I realize that the magic moment had disappeared completely. It would take a major act of seduction on his part to get me feeling ‘lively’ again and for some reason I am no longer in the mood to deal with him this evening. I think his muttering of that boy’s name was the final straw.

 

I ignore the worried looks he keeps giving to me as we make our way up to my apartment and I am not helping much by not making any conversation. I switch on the lights in my home and take off my shoes quickly before heading straight for my bedroom.

 

“Get yourself something to eat,” I say curtly over my shoulder as I shrug out of my jacket. “And if you want to watch TV you do so or if you want to continue sleeping then you can do that as well.”

 

I only manage to catch a glimpse of the surprised and hurt look he gives to me before I all but slam the door in his face. I sigh softly and rub a hand across my forehead. Yeah, that was really mature of me. Perhaps someone should just give me a good kick in the pants and remind me of who was supposed to be the adult around here.

 

I strip out of my clothes quickly not forgetting to take off my glasses as well. I can see – barely – without them and one of my past girlfriends had suggested I buy contact lenses. She had said something to the effect of I looking more handsome without them but I am not so sure. I squint a little and stare at my reflection in the mirror. Without them, I feel a bit more…vulnerable. Don’t laugh for that is the way I really feel. I didn’t always have them, you know. My eyesight was perfectly fine until I reached about the age of fifteen or so. Now, that I think of it, I really don’t know why I had started wearing them but my sight had indeed gotten worse from the constant wear and it reluctantly became an invisible shield between I and the rest of world. Behind them, I felt confident and strong – the honorable Ogata-sensei. But without them – I was just…well… Ogata Seiji, a man with no desire to carry on with such a charade any longer. I was just…me.

 

And who am I really?

 

With a sigh, I walk into the bathroom and turn the taps on with rather forceful jerks. I wonder what Akira’s doing at the moment. Perhaps, he’s gone back to sleep to dream about his wonderful boyfriend again and for one brief instant I imagine myself walking up to him and announcing that I had kissed the blond in the elevator. Hn…I doubt he’ll take that very well.

 

As I watch the bathtub fill with water, I reach for the small stool to begin my nightly process of washing myself from head to foot. A good scrub and a long soak should be able to ease me out of my predicament and with any luck I would be able to go to sleep tonight with no worries or thoughts of a certain…

 

“Sensei?”

 

I all but drop my sponge and soap to the floor as I lift my head to blink a bit owlishly at the boy standing within the door to my bathroom. He has a white towel draped rather loosely around his waist and I am treated to the familiar sight of his pale skin…at least the much that I can make out (the mist and me without my glasses isn’t exactly helping my visibility much) but still…

 

“Akira?! I’m in here! Can’t you see that?”

 

Was that a gasp? I can’t be sure but to my chagrin he says – a bit flustered –

 

“I didn’t think…”

 

“Couldn’t you hear the shower running?” I interrupt, feeling myself getting a bit flustered as well. And just why is my heart beating so much faster? Shouldn’t he be…

 

“….sleeping?”

 

“I…I couldn’t sleep, sensei,” he begins to explain but again I cut in rudely.

 

“Well, wait outside until I’m ready! And knock next time for Kami’s sake!”

 

“But…”

 

“No buts, Akira…”

 

“You have an extra stool! I could always use that one,” he says quickly, causing me to blink in surprise as he begins to move things about to suit his needs. I honestly wish I have my glasses with me so I can make out just what he is doing but all I can see is him – at least it had to be a person – moving before and around me. It is a bit disconcerting.

 

“Akira…” I growl out softly but his light laugh has me scowling instead.

 

“What’s the matter, sensei?” I hear his towel being hung up somewhere. “It’s not as if we haven’t taken a bath together.”

 

“That was different,” I mumble to myself as I begin to scrub my hair a bit faster and harder. I think I’m going to rip my scalp out if I don’t take it easy.

 

“Eh? Really? I was ten at the time…”

 

“So?” I swear he sometimes talks like he’s ten all over again!

 

“So we took our bath together…”

 

“At an onsen, Akira. An onsen. That’s different. This is my bathroom. In my house. My private space. And you are invading it.”

 

“But…”

 

“Just scrub and get it over and done with,” I grate out impatiently as I try to reach for my back.

 

“I’ll do it,” he volunteers and before I can even think of something witty or smart to say, he’s made his way behind me - and I’m sure he’s on his knees – and has taken away the small towel from my hand. “It will be much easier this way, sensei,” he mutters and I shiver reluctantly as I feel his warm breath against my skin. I close my eyes and lower my head, my shoulder slumping in defeat as I allow him to begin his slow torture.

 

The towel begins its journey from the base of my neck and slowly makes its way down my spine in one long sweep. I bite my lower lip to stop from telling him to discontinue his actions as I feel myself responding quite reluctantly to them. He moves the towel a bit lower – to the base of my spine - and I am powerless to stop the small gasp of pleasure that escapes my throat. It is quite a sensitive area for me and I curse myself inwardly for giving that away. Akira’s sharp and it’s only natural that he’s noticed it. The little devil has begun to make it a duty to scrub that particular area with a thoroughness that’s only doing more to make me want to…

 

“Aaah…”

 

Shit. I just had to say that out loud, didn’t I?

 

I swear I can literally hear him smirk behind me as he moves the towel towards the crack between my ass.

 

“Don’t even dare…” I manage to pant out softly, realizing now that my cock is beginning to twitch and swell with each passing second.

 

He laughs then – a small light sound that makes me shiver again in dull pleasure. He teases my ass again and in retaliation I move my hand quickly to smack his own rear lightly.

 

“Ouch.”

 

“Rinse me off, Akira,” I mumble thickly.

 

“Ha…hai…” His breathing is just as uneven as mine and I know that the sudden heat in the room has nothing to do with the steam or the waters waiting for us in the bath.

 

I brace myself and allow him to douse me with the warm water and shaking my head quickly I open up my eyes – only to come face-to-face with Akira’s very erect flesh – heh, even I could tell what that was without my glasses.

 

I smirk and before he can move away, lean forward to flick my tongue across the cum-slicked tip. He gives a small cry and places his hands upon my shoulders to steady himself and I all but come at just how delicious that whiny near whimpering sound is. Pity, I can’t really see his expression that well, but I am sure he is flushed and just as horny as I am – well I was facing the evidence right now, wasn’t I?

 

“Do you need some help with something, Akira?” I ask with a wicked grin as I lick my lips in hungry anticipation. Dear gods, but he tastes like nothing else I’ve ever had.

 

“Mmm…sensei…” He rocks his hips and thrusts shamelessly towards me all but begging to be taken completely. Who am I to deny him such a request? And so placing my hands behind his taut ass cheeks, I open up my mouth and happily begin to feast on him with a hunger that even surprises me. I vaguely listen to his cries and moans of delight above me, as I swirl my tongue around that swollen head. I lick the entire throbbing length over and over again, relishing in the feel of his balls slapping against my jaw as they shrivel and tighten with growing pressure.

 

His fingernails must be leaving scratch marks on my shoulders but I do not really care at this point. His body is practically trembling now and with each cry of my name, I dare myself to see just how far I can bring him to the brink of no return. I begin to caress his ass gently and slowly tease that tiny opening between them with a finger. He shivers and presses even deeper within my mouth and his scream, as I finally thrust into him, makes my cock begin to cry for attention. I feel drops of cum trail down my inner thighs and I begin to plunge deeper and harder into him.

 

“Sen…sei! I’m com…com….I’m coming, sensei!”

 

Yes, my dear Akira! Come for me and let me taste you!

 

He explodes so fast that I barely have the time to capture every drop. I greedily try to swallow as much of the thick liquid as possible, savoring, groaning and almost exploding myself at just how good my lover tasted. I release him with a long, lingering lick of his nearly flaccid flesh and gently withdraw my finger from his ass. He finally collapses upon me, too weak to stand now on his own.

 

I am sorry, dear bath, but you are just going to have to wait until I am done with my young ward.

 

I rise slowly to my feet, placing my hands behind his knees to cradle him gently within my arms. He wraps his own around my neck and buries his flushed face against my chest and I cannot stop myself from moaning in pleasure as he flicks out a tongue to tease my erect nipple.

 

Such a naughty boy, my Akira is.

 

I lead us back to the bedroom and sit upon my single but rather comfortable looking chair. I force him to straddle my lap, causing his cock to rub against mine as we both move at the same time. He holds on to the arm-rests and begins to rock back and forth on my lap, his lashes hooded with lust as he begins to moan and lick his lips oh so seductively.

 

“Sen…sei…sensei…” he breathes thickly as he leans forward to rest his forehead against mine. I stare deeply into those beautiful green eyes and feel myself getting lost all over again. Oh…sweet god…to be with you like this forever…that is all I ask…

 

He lifts his hips. I place my hand upon them. He closes his eyes and arches his neck, revealing that smooth, pale and delectable flesh to my gaze. He begins to lower himself upon me – little by little – inch by precious inch, I bury myself into him. He begins to mewl – a low whiny almost throaty sound that sends me reeling with pleasure. It becomes a low cry as we both still our movements to get used to being this close again. It’s been a long week. A long week of not being with each other. I fill him completely, knowing that this is where I truly belong. He moves. He wants me to move and I willingly oblige.

 

And so we begin our sinful dance, our only music, the sounds of an ecstasy that we will never get enough of. It’s slow at first – a steady rhythm that’s almost tentative and pure. I want to be gentle with him – to show him that I am not as rough as I tend to be sometimes. But our lust and desire knows no bounds and before long, his arms are around my neck, our hips moving with a speed that makes everything around us become a blur. I hungrily suck on his neck, his chest, his jaw, on his nipples, every and any expanse of flesh that is exposed to me. I want him like a drug – need him like nothing I’ve ever wanted before.

 

Akira…Akira…Akira…what we do here…can never be spoken about to anyone. I am merely one to fulfill your fantasies just as you are to mine. We can never be together. You and I both know that only too well.

 

I am ashamed to admit but the tears do somehow break free as I bury my face against his shoulder – hot and bitter tears of regret and inherent loss. To know that I will never really have what I truly want. It’s the harsh reality of life and its cruel hand of fate only feels its need to deal me with yet another blow. I feel something warm against my own skin and I know that he too is sobbing silently.

 

Don’t cry, Akira. There is really nothing to weep over. You are young and will have many more chances ahead of you but for a man like me…there is only immediate pleasure and satisfaction.

 

We both finally give in to the crescendo within us – screaming out our orgasms to the world and no longer caring about the consequences – whatever that may be.

 

I love you, Akira, I think to myself as he falls upon me with exhaustion. I think I have always loved you…

 

He’s already fallen asleep as I listen to his steady breathing against my chest. I close my eyes and cradle him gently still buried deep within him.

 

I have loved you since you came into my life…it only grew as the years went by…

 

I brush away his dark locks gently, staring into the peaceful repose with a wistful smile.

 

Do you remember the day we first met? You were hiding behind your father and refused to shake my hand when we were introduced. You just kept staring at me and I will admit I was a bit wary of you. But I became your onii-chan – well, I did tell you to stop calling me that – but it made me feel happy inside, do you know that, Akira?

 

I sigh softly and turn my gaze towards the window, watching the faint arch of the moon forcing its way behind a cloud.

 

I love you, Akira and it’s because of this…I know that I will have to give you away to whom you truly belong to. He is hurting despite his rather callous way of doing things and despite my obvious dislike of the situation – I have no other choice but to let you go.

 

Ah, but that tight squeeze in my heart only reminds me of just why I have tried to stop myself from that fickle emotion called love over the years.

 

But it is a decision I have come to and there’s nothing that can make me change my mind. I will have to ‘break’ it off with Akira and find a way to get he and Shindo back together again.

 

I am sure it will be the best thing…for all of us…

 

 

TBC…